Elizabeth
Elizabeth is a native Texan and stay at home mom to a 3-year-old human hurricane in pigtails and a 1-year-old son who is currently jockeying for the title of world’s biggest mama’s boy. She has been married to her husband, who lives in perpetual denial of the fact that he is, in fact, a Yankee, for eight long (and wonderful!) years. Together they have renovated a historical home with their own little hands (never again), braved the winters of New York (and decided they’d rather not), and discovered a profound and binding love of travel (travel without the children, that is). They currently reside in Fair Oaks Ranch where they are surrounded by family and deer.
Hobby Lobby and the Demise of a Formerly Rational Homemaker
When you walk your sweaty, smelly, completely beaten-down-by-the-seemingly-never-ending-summer self into Hobby Lobby in mid-August and find that same self immediately and perhaps unexpectedly assaulted by Christmas paraphernalia and cheer, you'll react in one of three...
How Low Can You Go: A Primer in the Importance of Keeping Your Expectations...
The year was 1999. A group of us, all idealistic college seniors at the time, were perched around the kitchen counter of my friend’s impossibly cool mom, enthusiastically soaking up every last syllable of...
FML Syndrome: When the Mouth Goes on Forever and the Talking Never Ends
I’m beginning to realize that people in the olden days were on to something when they said children should be seen and not heard. I’ve come to this conclusion after witnessing a scientific miracle of...
This is Impossible: Lessons in Parenting from Peppa Pig
My children watch TV. There, I said it. There are days, in fact, when they probably watch up to, if not more than, the maximum recommended daily allowance of the boob tube. And while I’m...
I Came, I Saw, I Conquered: Taming the Beast that is the Autoflush Potty
Although it might be a bit of a stretch to say that autoflush toilets have ruined my life, I can confidently tell you that—for a period of time, anyway—they came close. What is your...
Please, Sir, May I Have One More?: Longing for Another Child when “Oops, I...
I’ve always known—or at least since I knew I wanted to have children—that I wanted to have three. To me, three just seems like the perfect number of kids: neither too few to be...
Ready or Not, Here I Grow: A Mother’s Chronicles in Being So Very Far...
Have you ever experienced that phenomenon wherein something that you look at every day inexplicably becomes invisible to you? Maybe it’s an ever-growing stack of mail that manages to escape your peripheral vision, a...
Mommy Brain: You Bet Your Britches It’s Real!
You know what astounds me about science? It’s widely regarded as the standard by which any number of things should be evaluated, and yet in many cases it’s—how do I put this delicately?—really, really...
Mommy and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
Our mission for the afternoon was simple: My three-year-old daughter and I were going to pick up a prescription and buy toys and supplies to fill Operation Christmas Child boxes. I had contemplated—seriously contemplated—buying...
Somebody to Love: My Quest to Find a Mommy BFF
My best friend from college recently sent me a great piece from BuzzFeed detailing why your friends from college are destined to be your friends for life. What it boils down to, I guess,...
Me and My Little Man: A Story of Weaning My Baby
For all that is written on the subject of beginning that ultimate bonding relationship with your baby known as breastfeeding, I feel like precious little space is devoted to detailing what happens when you...
How to Succeed at Mealtime Without Really Trying (like at all)
In case you haven’t noticed, it's back to school time, and that has really thrown me a curveball. Nevermind that I don’t have any kids who really qualify for the back to school drill...
Lessons in when “Doubt Means Don’t”…But You Do
Mistakes happen to the best of us - it's just one of the ugly truths of life. But is there anything worse than making a mistake and knowing you have no one to blame but...
Dogs, Husband, Kids: It’s Complicated
My pug Frankie had yet another near death experience this week. Frankie laughs in the face of cats with their meager nine lives. He’s enjoyed 18 and counting. This time Frankie ate a tube of...